Let's make this birthday one to remember.

64 years old (Born on January 18, 1961)

Happy Birthday, Shelly Miscavige! Wherever you are hiding—oops, we mean celebrating—we hope your day is filled with laughter and cake. After all, being the mysterious first lady of Scientology must be exhausting; you've certainly mastered the art of keeping everyone guessing!

Your ability to stay out of the spotlight rivals even Bigfoot's legendary stealth skills. Here's hoping this year brings you plenty more "me-time," relaxation, and perhaps a surprise appearance or two—just to keep us on our toes. Cheers to another year of successfully maintaining your enigmatic charm and unmatched hide-and-seek championship title!