Let's make this birthday one to remember.

38 years old (Born on September 11, 1986)

Happy Birthday, Andrew Cashner! From your towering presence on the mound to that blazing fastball that left batters shaking in their cleats, you've always been larger than life. Ever since your big league debut with the Chicago Cubs back in 2010, you've given fans countless memorable moments—like those times hitters swung so late they practically needed binoculars just to spot your pitches!

Here's hoping this birthday is as epic as your best strikeouts and as smooth as one of your effortless innings. May you celebrate today with fewer curveballs and more cakeballs—because let's face it, even flamethrowers deserve a sweet treat now and then!