Let's make this birthday one to remember.

80 years old (Born on December 26, 1944)

Happy Birthday, Bill! From shaking up the establishment to stirring debates in lecture halls, you've always known how to make an explosive impression—figuratively speaking, of course. Conservatives might still check under their beds for you at night, but your students remember you as that professor who ignited minds rather than buildings.

Your recent years have been filled with thoughtful writing and passionate advocacy; clearly retirement hasn't dampened your revolutionary spirit. Here's hoping this birthday is peaceful enough not to trigger any FBI alerts—but exciting enough that conservatives keep nervously glancing over their shoulders. Cheers to another year of fearless ideas!