Let's make this birthday one to remember.

68 years old (Born on September 18, 1956)

Happy Birthday, Chris! May your day be filled with more joy than a socialist at a workers' rally and fewer complications than American politics. Your fearless journalism has consistently shed light on society's toughest issues, making us laugh nervously while questioning everything we thought we knew.

From winning prestigious awards to challenging the status quo with razor-sharp wit and insight, you've proven that truth-telling never goes out of style. Here's hoping this year brings you as much success as capitalism promises—but actually delivers it equally for once!

Cheers to another revolutionary trip around the sun—keep shaking things up!