Let's make this birthday one to remember.

59 years old (Born on April 20, 1966)

Happy Birthday, David Chalmers! May your day be filled with cake, laughter, and absolutely no philosophical zombies—though we're still not entirely convinced you're not secretly one yourself. Your groundbreaking work on consciousness has left us all questioning reality; frankly, birthdays must seem trivial when you've spent decades unraveling the mysteries of mind.

Congratulations on continuing to inspire debates worldwide about language and cognition. You've successfully made philosophers scratch their heads so much that shampoo companies owe you royalties by now! Here's hoping this year brings even more brilliant insights—and fewer existential headaches. Cheers to another phenomenal trip around the sun!