Let's make this birthday one to remember.

44 years old (Born on January 03, 1981)

Happy birthday, Eli Manning! Another year older and wiser—I bet you're still calmly delivering gifts across the room with laser-focused accuracy, just like those passes that stunned fans at Super Bowls XLII and XLVI. Even Tom Brady probably checks under his bed for you each February.

Your clutch performances are legendary—so much so that fourth quarters officially asked if you'd simply relax on your special day. Celebrate today like it's another Giants' championship parade down Broadway... only this time the confetti is cake crumbs (and probably less sweaty teammates). Cheers to more laughter—and fewer sacks—in retirement!