Let's make this birthday one to remember.

81 years old (Born on December 11, 1943)

Happy Birthday, John Kerry! From bravely navigating the rivers of Vietnam to boldly steering through choppy political waters in your presidential run, you've certainly earned some cake and relaxation. Let's hope birthday candles aren't a swift-boating hazard this year—better keep those medals clear!

More recently, as global envoy on climate change, you're still fighting battles—not with swift boats or campaign speeches—but against melting glaciers and rising temperatures. Here's wishing you another year filled with air miles that rival diplomacy tours, spirited debates that outperform even 2004's finest moments, and enough renewable energy (and coffee) to power all future challenges.