Let's make this birthday one to remember.

31 years old (Born on May 28, 1994)

Happy Birthday, John Stones! Ever since you stepped onto Everton's pitch back in 2013 and quickly became the defensive rock fans admired, we've watched your talent soaring faster than a Wayne Rooney volley. Your graceful tackles and cool-headed clearances have defenders worldwide checking notes like "how does he make that look easy?"

Your debut for England in 2014 proved to everyone you're more solid at defending goals than we are sticking to our New Year's resolutions. Keep aging like fine wine—calm under pressure yet always ready with a witty tackle (football or humor). May your year be filled with clean sheets—and fewer own-goal bloopers!