Let's make this birthday one to remember.

80 years old (Born on December 26, 1945)

Happy Birthday, John Walsh! You've spent decades chasing down America's most elusive criminals—honestly, candles on your cake don't stand a chance. Your relentless dedication has made you the ultimate crime-fighting icon; even Chuck Norris probably checks under his bed for you.

From hosting "America's Most Wanted" to tirelessly advocating for victims' rights and child safety laws, you've turned tragedy into triumph countless times. Thanks to your unwavering commitment and sharp instincts, justice sleeps easier at night (and fugitives sleep with one eye open). Here's wishing you another year of success—and fewer late-night calls from the FBI!